


Terran Noodle Soup

by Groot (grootiez)



Series: Growing Up Groot [5]
Category: Groot - Fandom, Guardians of the Galaxy (Cartoon), Guardians of the Galaxy (Comics), Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Baby Groot (Marvel), Gen, Kraglin and Yondu’s Parenting Skills, Kraglin’s unhealthy obsession with soup, Mary Poppins - Freeform, Peter Quill’s Traumatic Childhood, Soup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-01-11
Packaged: 2019-09-02 14:31:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16788817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grootiez/pseuds/Groot
Summary: Kraglin’s super secret recipe for his galaxy-famous “Terran Noodle Soup.”





	Terran Noodle Soup

**Author's Note:**

  * For [madness_on_the_milano](https://archiveofourown.org/users/madness_on_the_milano/gifts), [Mattchewy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mattchewy/gifts), [Woozletania](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Woozletania/gifts), [Groot_Is_God](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Groot_Is_God/gifts), [groot_guardians14](https://archiveofourown.org/users/groot_guardians14/gifts), [janetgenea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/janetgenea/gifts), [Groot_and_Rocket](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Groot_and_Rocket/gifts), [lita](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lita/gifts), [MeepMorpRain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeepMorpRain/gifts), [RR4901](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RR4901/gifts), [minuus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/minuus/gifts), [Sinikettu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinikettu/gifts), [ThatSlyProcyon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatSlyProcyon/gifts), [thejollymilano](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thejollymilano/gifts).



**_Kraglin’s GALAXY-FAMOUS TERRAN NOODLE SOUP (QUILL, YOU BETTER NOT READ THIS!)_**

Ingredients (Serves 5-10 people.):

10 pounds of finely ground, minced, and deboned Terran. (The fresher the better.)

6 cups of finely diced Xandarian Onions. 

6 cups of sliced Cadmanian Celery.

6 cups of Carrots freshly shipped in from Berhert.

8 cups of Orloni Egg Noodles.

2 tablespoons of Dry Basil from Contraxia.

2 tablespoons of Dry Kronan Oregano.

2 tablespoons of Salt from Titan.

1/2 tablespoon of Garlic Powder from Vormir.

1/2 tablespoon of Black Pepper. (Stolen from the Kyln’s Prison Kitchen.)

4 tablespoons of Salted Butter from Knowhere.

10 cups of Terran Broth.

Instructions:

1\. Melt butter in a large pot over medium heat. Add the carrots, celery, and onions until they’re tender, which is about 5 minutes. Gently pour the Terran broth into the mix.

2\. Next, shred the fresh Terran into nice little strips before you pound it. (This is Twig’s favorite part.) Now, you could go really fancy and go out and shoot a Terran on their home planet, but certain Galaxy laws make that illegal. (Sorry, Rat.)

3\. Now, stir the noodles until they are a little bit limp. Put those in the pot along with the basil, oregano, salt, garlic powder, and pepper. Stir until they combine with the broth and give off a heavenly aroma. (No Cap’n, I am NOT singing “Spoonful of Sugar” while I cook! Ugh, you are _NOT_ Mary Poppins!)

4\. Anyways, the Salt can be a little bit hard to obtain since Titan’s obliteration, but Gamora and Nebula can easily get it thanks to their so-called “relationship” with their “Father”, Thanos.

5\. Boil the soup until you hear the Milano’s fire alarms, the reduce the heat to a simmer and cook the soup for 25-30 minutes before serving to your merry band of A-Holes.

Serving:

Once you get your gang of Ravagers around the dinner table, (and wrangle the Twiglet into his high chair), serve the soup to them and let them season it to their own preference. (Drax likes to add _A LOT_ of spices for some reason...)

Notes:

Now, the taste takes some getting used to. (Mantis didn’t like my soup at first, but after a couple of spoonfuls, she soon started to like it.)

FYI: Quill doesn’t know that Cap’n and I have turned him into a cannibal. After we picked him up from Terra, he kept complaining about having nothing to eat. Of course, we were low on food, so I made something quick for him to eat. Quill asked what it was. I was about to explain what was in it when Cap’n gave me the ol’ “Stink Eye” and mouthed for me to lie. So I did. And to this day, Quill still doesn’t know that he’s eating his own kind.


End file.
